Long Lives
/It’s easy for me - at mid-life - to think that I want to live to 100 years or beyond.
But I’ve become aware of people reaching their 80s or 90s and beginning to question why they are still alive - wishing for death. They soldier on unenthusiastically for their remaining days. There are interludes that are happier but the underlying mood of their lives has shifted. They may be ill - ranging from chronic aches and pains to unable to care for themselves or even get out of bed. The loss of their eyesight and hearing - and maybe even taste - may make their present life totally unsatisfying and isolated compared to what they remember. Or maybe the accumulated sorrows - parents long deceased, age-peers and friends and spouses gone more recently, family dispersed or nonexistent - become too much to bear. And there is gray blanket over it all - declining cognitive abilities; no one wants their body to outlast their mind.
The goal, then, is more complex. It is not simply to live for a long time…it is
To sustain the desire to live for the whole of life.
The key elements for achieving both parts of the goal are probably highly dependent on the individualbut these are the generic elements I think about the most:
- Keep your life’s purpose actionable in the present and pointed to the future. Purpose is not something that is static. It needs to be vital and included in every decision you make. Sometimes purpose is not as automatic after children are grown and independent or after you are financially secure. Maybe your purpose becomes helping the next generation (or the next). Maybe your purpose becomes your garden. Maybe you take on a political purpose.
- Maintain (or improve) the physical self. More years of wear and tear on the body begin to be noticeable at some point. It takes focus to eat well and exercise all through our lives - and it takes more of our time in later years. Isn’t it great that some parts can actually be improved through modern techniques (i.e. cataract removal and vision correction, knee replacement)?
- Continue to grow emotionally and intellectually. Why is our automatic response to fight change? Perhaps it is because change is often inflicted upon us rather than a choice we make for ourselves. Make the choice to change in ways that you value. Invigorate yourself by learning or doing something new.
- Be close to the people you love. Isn’t this something we want throughout our life? Even if we don’t achieve it during all times of our lives, it is something, at least for me, that grows in importance as the years go by.
