Cancer Diary – Entry 4

After a two week wait, the appointment with the surgeon occurred. The office was in an area that I hadn’t been to before - part of a major academic institution with a surgeon that was a specialist in the type of surgery I needed. My husband accompanied me as a second set of ears. Neither one of us has prior experience with cancer or surgeries like I needed so we anticipated it would be a learning experience even though we had prepared ourselves by reading the information provided by my endocrinologist and following some of the references with internet searches.

The appointment lasted about 1.5 hours and most of the time was spent with the surgeon and his assistant talking. They explained the procedure…setting expectations – and answered questions. I had come with a few but there were no big surprises since we had done our ‘homework.’ The prognosis is very positive since the cancer was discovered early through the monitoring that had been part of my annual physical for the past 7-8 years. They did a couple of tests to hone the exact type of surgery needed…and then the last few minutes were with the scheduler. Their schedule is so busy that the surgery is almost 3 months out. Evidently there are a lot of these type surgeries happening right now – maybe because of a backlog that developed during the pandemic and prior to vaccine availability.

A few days before the appointment – I got family news that one of my aunts was in the hospital diagnosed with stage 4 cancer and the evening after my appointment I learned that she was in the process of being released – returning home under hospice care. She is only about 8 years older than me! I grieve that her life is ending….also grateful that my cancer is a more treatable kind with a very high survival/cure rate.

When I am thinking objectively, the reassurance from the doctors that 1) this type of cancer is one of the most treatable and 2) the delay is not problematic is believable; however, on an emotional level, I realize that I need to keep busy over the interim between now and mid-January to keep myself from becoming overly anxious. Before we got home from the appointment, I had already decided to make a 2-week road trip to Texas to see my family….and to do more decorating than I have in recent years for November and December. I was glad that my husband was with me and was supportive of what I wanted to do. I plan to visit my daughter during my road trip and there will be a public observing night at the university’s observatory on the first evening I am there…an opportunity for me to see her at work! (We did ‘take your daughter to work’ days when she was growing up….so this could be our first ‘take your mother to work’ event!)

Cancer Diary – Entry 3

There were two weeks between my cancer diagnosis and the appointment with the surgeon. It’s a time of waiting. The challenge is to stay focused rather than anxious. I kept to my routines that have been honed over the years to keep stress productive rather than destructive:

• Writing things down…and letting them go. Setting a goal of journal entries of about 2,000 words per day…documenting whatever I am thinking about.

• Creating Zentangle tiles as islands of calm that result is something of beauty.

• Sticking to routines of life like grocery shopping and a haircut and yardwork…savoring the activity and the results.

• Browsing at least 4 books per day. Internet Archive makes it easy and costs nothing. My interests are broad so there is always a good supply on my ‘to browse’ list.

• Staying in touch with family. My daughter calls 3-4 times a week. I talk to my mother once a week. Texts fly almost daily with my sisters and daughter.

• Volunteering is more limited with the pandemic still impacting it…but it did resume this fall and I count it as a ‘routine’ even though it didn’t happen last fall or spring.

• Making a daily blog post…building up the posts to come out in the days ahead like I always do before travel. Now I am doing it so that I don’t have to worry about appointments or the surgery itself making it difficult to get posts ready to go.

• Exercise….sticking with the 12,000 steps per day and the 30 minutes of mindfulness/yoga. I feel better physically and mentally with this sustained routine.

There have also been special ‘projects’ undertaken during this waiting time…keeping myself busy -

• Day lily photograph – both zoomed and high key. I recognized the opportunity as soon as I saw the stalk of buds in my front flower bed.

• Day trip to Longwood Gardens. Getting out and about on a beautiful fall day in a relatively safe way as the pandemic continues.

• Savoring seasonal food – replacing salads with soups on cool fall days and enjoying the combinations of flavors. Green salsa is my favorite condiment right now.

• I continued my quest to lose a few pounds – watching my calories and nutrition (Cronometer app). My goal it to be in the best possible health I can be going into surgery.

• Getting trees trimmed. Our sycamore is brushing our roof and a skylight. It is so tall that I’ve arranged for an arborist to trim it and our plum tree; it was about a 3 week wait between getting the estimate and the work being done. Hope the weather cooperates!

Overall – the two weeks has been a time for me to Internalize the new reality…and anticipating a new normal after surgery. I’ve also gone from 1 medical related portal to 4! It would be great to somehow have them all consolidated but medical care in the US is often fragmented along specialty or provider network lines rather than focused on integrated patient care.

Cancer Diary – Entry 1

This is the first in a series of posts that I am writing as I make my way through the medical system after a cancer diagnosis….not focusing directly on the medical diagnosis or treatment…documenting the timeline, feelings and swirl of decisions that emerge over the coming weeks…and maybe months.

My doctor called in the early evening to give me the diagnosis from my biopsy. I appreciated the call and how he stayed positive re successful treatment but emphasized the next steps that needed to be taken. My first reaction was to fit in the surgery with what I already had on my calendar – which included almost a month-long road trip.  I shared the news with my husband; he was surprised since I am so rarely sick at all; I’ve only been in the hospital overnight twice in my life….and one of those was when I had my daughter!

During the hour or so between going to bed and getting to sleep, realized that my priorities needed to shift. I was too anxious about the diagnosis to not get the surgery as soon as possible. Early the next morning I sent a message via the doctor’s portal to indicate the change in my thinking. And started looking up fact sheets from the surgery center he’d recommended…and finding resources that rounded out what he had told me on the phone. I started a list of questions for the appointment with the doctor the next day….focused on the surgery and the medications required immediately and then after the surgery.

The doctor’s assistant called to confirm that she’d sent my records to the surgeon’s office and to give them a few hours before calling to get an initial appointment lined up with them.

I talked with my daughter and one of my sisters. Both were surprised and supportive of what I need to do.

I called the recommended surgeon’s office and made an appointment as a new patient. It is 2 weeks out…not too bad even though I would like to get started toward surgery faster. I now have yet another medical related portal too!

Overall – 24 hours into the experience, I’m pleased that there is forward momentum. I’m not sure how I’ll handle the 2 weeks of waiting…or the prospect of more weeks before the surgery can occur. Cancer is scary. I’m beginning to think about ways to keep myself busy enough to not be dragged unto a swirl of increasing anxiety.

17 Months in COVID-19 Pandemic

17 months into the pandemic and whatever optimism that I felt earlier about the vaccines helping the country return to normal this fall has evaporated. Last spring, I was very optimistic that by this time, I would be planning fall foliage/birding trips…that maybe we would be able to do the Staunton River Star Party – camp out on the field with other amateur astronomers. Now I am not looking seriously at any non-family related travel. I am hoping to be able to make another road trip to Texas for my mother’s 90th birthday in the early fall.

I’ve already posted about the road trip I took to Texas during this last month. It was the second one this year and very different than I expected when it came to COVID-19. The first trip was back in April-May just after I was fully vaccinated. At that time – I felt relatively secure and hopeful that the pandemic would be waning over the summer; the hotel had COVID-19 precautions in place and many people were wearing masks. I became more anxious as the second road trip progressed. The delta variant was surging in some areas when I drove from Maryland to Missouri to Texas, but other areas seemed relatively untouched. I limited my activities in Springfield, Missouri (one of the early places that the delta variant filled the hospitals); there were two indoor events I attended for a wedding in Dallas where it still seemed safe. By the time I started home, the delta variant was surging in more areas, no one was wearing a mask along my route except me (even in the hotel), and I was anxious enough about the possibility that I had been exposed to buy and use the at-home antigen test even though I never developed any symptoms. Based on statistics – if I was exposed and had a breakthrough infection, it would not be life threatening but I didn’t want to risk any ‘long COVID’ issues or expose others. It was reassuring to test negative with two tests. I was grateful that my daughter had convinced me to upgrade from cloth masks to KF94s last spring before I made my first trip. They are the mask I have been wearing since April.

The dominant emotion I feel now about COVID-19 is sadness – for the lives damaged and lost since the vaccine has become widely available…for not being with my family as much as I would like or traveling to places I enjoy…for the self-destruct aspect of the US culture that continues to surprise me (it is hard for me to accept its pervasiveness)…for the failure of leadership, particularly at the state level.

Mask mandates for indoor settings are something that can be helpful in the short term…but vaccine mandates might be even more important. With the full FDA approval of the vaccines, maybe vaccine mandates will become more widespread. They are already beginning to happen in health care, military and school settings. It will be a long slog with legal challenges, unfortunately.

I am conscious of activities I won’t be restarting anytime soon – as long as the delta variant continues to cause spikes in cases:

Flying. COVID-19 is just one of the reasons. The increased number of incidents with unruly passengers is another. I was disheartened that some airlines recently declined to mandate vaccines for their employees.

Eating in restaurants. I’ll enjoy take out but with the delta variant there is no way the filtration systems can make it safe to eat in the same indoor space with other unmasked (while eating) patrons.

Any spaces where there are a lot of people. Theaters are not a place I would want to be; same for stores during times when a lot of people are shopping. Even parks are problematic if there are large numbers of people.

I am going to the training for the fall programs where I have volunteered in years past. Most of the programs are outdoors…I’ll do some of them this fall…skip the ones that have an indoor setting.

Last spring – I expected that the August post might be my last about my COVID-10 pandemic experiences. But it isn’t over yet. So frustrating….and sad.

Gleanings of the Week Ending Saturday May 8, 2021

The items below were ‘the cream’ of the articles and websites I found this past week. Click on the light green text to look at the article.

Top 25 Birds of the Week: Seedeaters! – Starting out the gleanings list with bird photographs.

Mapping tree inequality: Why many people don’t benefit from tree cover – Trees are an effective way to reduce the heat island effect within cities (i.e. where there are fewer trees it is hotter). Lower income communities tend to have fewer trees…and thus are hotter. As there are more hot days, the impact is becoming greater. There is also a beauty to trees…each one is an island of nature in a sea of concrete and asphalt. Increasing trees in cities and towns is an investment in physical and mental health!

Roman temple at Egyptian Emerald Mine – In the eastern Egyptian desert. The researchers found 19 coins, incense burners, bronze and steatite figurines, bones, terracotta body parts, and amulets.

Return of Brood X Cicadas – This brood emerges in the area where I live in Maryland. I am not there to see it, but I hope my husband can photograph some emerging cicadas. There should be lots of opportunities!

Invasive Jumping Worms Have Spread to 15 States – This species is in the middle of the country. I haven’t seen any yet in Texas, but they are in the state and my daughter might have them in Missouri. Hopefully, there will be a method to control them soon or the landscape of that area of the country could change…they are a small organism with a big impact.

A Retreat to Catoctin – This park is close  (about an hour) from where I live in Maryland. I’ve been there many times….maybe not often enough.

Hopes and Weeping Trees: What’s up with the Yellow-bellied Sapsucker? – Neat rows of holes in tree trunks? There is a sapsucker around. Sometimes hummingbirds will come to get the sap dribbling out of the holes. I am always pleased to discover a tree that has been visited by a sapsucker; I noticed when I was at Mt. Pleasant this spring that the tree that was convenient to a hiking route for school field trips (pre-pandemic) has been cut down so I will hunt for another one to share with hikers.

Trove of 2,000-Year-Old Bronze Mirrors Found in Ancient Chinese Cemetery – 80 mirrors….ranging from 3-9 inches in diameter. There are other artifacts recovered from the same cemetery….maybe more stories to come as the excavations and analysis of finds continues.

Charting ice from above – The Icebird flights….flying low over ice and open water. What if feels like to be part of the crew.

National Parks Traveler Checklist: Padre Island National Sea Shore – My husband and I have been to parts of the Padre Island National Sea Shore for snippets of time. Our plan to visit in 2017 to see more of the park was cancelled after Hurricane Harvey…maybe we should add it to our post-pandemic travel plans!

A few minutes observing – Kale

When I took my car in for service before I left on my road trip to Texas – I noticed the kale that overwintered in the planters while I was waiting for my car to be driven out of the garage…took a few minutes to photograph the foliage and the flowers.

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When I took my car in for service before I left on my road trip to Texas – I noticed the kale that overwintered in the planters while I was waiting for my car to be driven out of the garage…took a few minutes to photograph the foliage and the flowers.

I am realizing that finding little pockets of beauty around me – wherever I happen to be – is something I’ve trained myself to do. In this case I was surrounded by concrete, asphalt, car dealership…but the planters were what I noticed while I waited. The pandemic has probably heightened my need and skill in finding/savoring beauty – often documenting it with some phone photography. It’s one of the coping skills I do almost automatically these days.

Gleanings of the Week Ending April 17, 2021

The items below were ‘the cream’ of the articles and websites I found this past week. Click on the light green text to look at the article.

Top 25 birds of the week: Forests! – Photographs and birds….always a great start to the gleanings list for the week.

Regulators Ban Fracking Permanently in the Four-State Delaware River Watershed - Yale E360 – The watershed provides drinking water to 13 million people in Pennsylvania, Delaware, New Jersey and New York….critical to not have toxic leaks into that supply….and the fracking industry does not have good track record when it comes to water quality.

Scientists stunned to discover plants beneath mile-deep Greenland ice -- ScienceDaily - Long-lost ice core provides direct evidence that giant ice sheet melted off within the last million years and is highly vulnerable to a warming climate.

The legendary fabric that no one knows how to make - BBC Future – Dhaka muslin…with thread counts up to 1,200.

Diphtheria risks becoming major global threat again as it evolves antimicrobial resistance -- ScienceDaily – Resistance to antibiotics and vaccine escape becoming more common/likely….not a good prospect.

Climate Change Lays Waste to Butterflies Across American West | Smart News | Smithsonian Magazine – The total number of observed butterflies west of the Rocky Mountains has fallen by 1.6 percent every year since 1977….that adds up to over 65% decrease!

Reflecting on your own capabilities boosts resilience -- ScienceDaily – Thinking about memories of successfully overcoming past challenges may help us cope with crisis situations we are facing in the present.

Great Lakes people among first coppersmiths | Science – The Old Copper Culture began earlier and faded earlier that previously thought…starting about 9,500 years ago and ending about 5,000 years ago. A climate shift might have caused the culture to shift from using copper for tools to adornment at the end of the period.

Waste from making purple corn chips yields a natural dye, supplements, kitty litter -- ScienceDaily – I like processes that dramatically reduce the amount of agricultural waste. I wonder if the purple kitty litter would stain carpet if it was tracked out of the litter box though.

Why cats won’t punish a stranger who harms you - BBC Future – Evidently cats do form emotional bonds with their humans…but they probably don’t pick up on human social relationships….not as domesticated as dogs.

Gleanings of the Week Ending April 3, 2021

The items below were ‘the cream’ of the articles and websites I found this past week. Click on the light green text to look at the article.

New wearable device turns the body into a battery -- ScienceDaily – I’m always forgetting to charge my Fitbit until the low battery warning message comes up. It would be great to never need to charge it!

Soot from Asia travels express on a highway to the high Arctic : Research Highlights – Soot in the Arctic traced back to its source.

Working outdoors linked to lower risk of breast cancer among older women -- ScienceDaily - Outdoor workers are able to make more vitamin D which may be protective, say researchers. This is an observation…but might indicate a thread for future research.

World's first dinosaur preserved sitting on nest of eggs with fossilized babies – An fossilized Oviraptorosaur, a bird-like theropod, found on a nest filled with its 24 eggs.

Stealth Chemicals: A Call to Action on a Threat to Human Fertility - Yale E360 and Air pollution: The silent killer called PM 2.5 -- ScienceDaily – Products of human ingenuity that are negatively impacting our health.

94% of older adults prescribed drugs that raise risk of falling: From 1999-2017, more than 7.8 billion fall-risk-increasing drugs were prescribed to older adults in the US, and deaths from falls doubled -- ScienceDaily – In my 50s, my doctor prescribed a blood pressure medication that made me dizzy. When I complained about it (citing the danger of becoming dizzy and falling down stairs being a greater risk than the benefit of lowering my blood pressure to the level she was attempting), she decided I didn’t need the medication since I was taking half the lowest dose tablet. I hope that the medical professionals prescribing the fall-risk-increasing drugs are more careful about how they are using them now for older people particularly…but for younger people too. Sometimes it seems like the trend is to always ‘treat with drugs’ to address a specific problem rather than integrating for the overall health of the individual.

Was This Helmet Worn by an Ancient Greek Soldier During the Persian Wars? | Smart News | Smithsonian Magazine – Found by a dredging vessel off the coast of Haifa, Israel.

50 Birds: Adventures in Backyard Birding – Birding can be done anywhere. Many people have discovered the joy of bird watching from home during this pandemic year.

Joshua Trees: An Uncertain Future For A Mojave Desert Icon – A big fire and climate change….are the Joshua Trees doomed?

Health declining in Gen X and Gen Y, US study shows -- ScienceDaily – The long-term trends are not positive; the US was already seeing decreases in life expectancy and increases in disability/morbidity pre-pandemic. The study pointed to the increase in unhealthy behaviors over the past decades that medical treatment cannot overcome. Based on the response to public health measures attempted in the US for the pandemic, it’s difficult to be optimistic that any kind of intervention could be broadly effective.

Ten Little Celebrations – March 2021

The overarching celebration of the past few months and March is family staying healthy. I’m listing 10 additional ‘little’ celebrations from my notes about March. The weather got warmer in March and 5 of the celebrations are outdoors!

• Pine cones – Early in the month, before much was blooming – I celebrated finding pine cones on the ground at Centennial Park to photograph…quickly since there were too many people around to be comfortable for longer.

• Howard County Conservancy outdoor greeter (volunteering) – I am beginning to volunteer again…outdoors and distanced and masked…but enjoying the interactions with people new to the place and the people I’ve met in prior years. I’m celebrating the small step toward a restart of activities I missed during the pandemic.

• A day warm enough to walk without a coat – Celebrating springtime.

• Finding a feather to photograph – Finding a feather is always a serendipity event. This time it was a tiny feather mixed in with tulip poplar seeds I was sweeping off the deck. It was a double celebration: finding the feather and then the photoshoot with a macro lens.

• Skunk cabbage, shelf fungus, daffodils, crocus, plum blossoms – So many things to photograph. Celebrating the sights of spring.

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There were two celebrations related to the vaccine:

• My husband and I getting vaccinated – We were so relieved to get an appointment…and then to get the first dose of the Moderna vaccine 6 days later. It was something to celebrate….and a beacon of hope. We’ll get the second shot in early May.

• My daughter and son-in-law getting vaccinated – Also a big relief because both are working at a university that has stayed open (with a mask mandate). They got the Johnson & Johnson vaccine a few hours after they were notified of the availability.

And then there are three miscellaneous celebrations:

• Spice cake muffins – My husband was bored with our usual meals….so I made muffins as a special treat. We celebrated the tasty (and different than usual) treats.

• Getting everything on the grocery list – It seems like there is always something that is not available in the store when our shopper fills our order….and then we had a time when everything was in stock. It was a celebration just because it hadn’t happened before!

Successful road trip practice – I am practicing driving at highway speeds to be ready – once I am fully vaccinated – to make road trip (and extended visit) to see my parents. I am celebrating the successful practice and the anticipation of seeing family that I haven’t seen for over a year.

10 months in COVID-19 Pandemic

The vaccines began in the 10th month of the pandemic. It is a grand hope tempered by a sluggish rollout so far and a more contagious variant that is already problematic in the UK and being found in the US now. We have stopped most of our ideas of ‘getting out’ more…we are back to the strategy of ‘staying at home as much as possible.’

The 10th month included a crescendo of events other than the pandemic that ramped up stress levels higher than ever before. As I write this – the events of January 6th are at the top of the crescendo. I will always remember being at home trying to keep an eye on the news without being overwhelmed by it just before things broke apart. I was frustrated and a little angry that the Missouri and Texas Senator (and too many of their cohorts in the House and Senate) were using a usually mundane session of Congress as a political grand stand to perpetuate statements that had already been investigated and proven untrue – sometimes in a court…..and then it got worse very quickly with a mob storming the US Capitol – pushing past barricades, breaking windows, climbing walls, wearing costumes and seemingly treating the event as a party in the Capitol complete with damaging the building and the people trying to preserve it and the institution in houses, the House and Senate members evacuated from their chambers. It was horrifying. I didn’t stay up for the Congress to complete their work of the day…kudos to them for the long day to get it done. In the aftermath – the extent of the problem in our country became clearer…and the discomfort of knowing that the delusion of an election stolen from Trump is so deeply anchored in the belief of some people that it became an effort to overturn voters, the Electoral College and the rule of law. The country is more fragile than it has been during my lifetime…because of the failure of the Executive Branch of our government (through ineptitude and malfeasance) and the pandemic. We have so many concurrent crises (which could have been avoided or ameliorated with competent leadership); we are not as strong as we always thought we were.

In the best case…I hope the focus over the next month can shift away from worrying about the next surprise from the President to getting as many vaccines delivered and into people plus following advice to reduce risks (masks, washing hands, social distancing, avoiding being in indoor spaces with people outside our ‘bubble.’ My husband and I have bookmarked the vaccination site in our state to sign up for a vaccine as soon as our group is eligible.

The high points over the past month have been associated with family events – birthday, anniversary, holiday – celebrated virtually with Zoom calls and (in the case of the birthday) slices of red velvet cake enjoyed by several of us in different states on the day.  Special foods almost every day like pumpkin roll, hay stacks, and snow ice cream. There were events in nature to enjoy too: a pileated woodpecker in the forest, sunspots, and lady bugs occasionally on the walls of my office escaping the cold. I donated another porch sized pile of stuff – clearing out some household accumulation that we no longer need. There were good things that happened in pandemic month 10.

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At the 10-month mark – there is a ‘light’ at the end of the tunnel - getting the two doses of the vaccine. I don’t think it will happen for us in the next 30 days but sometime after that…early spring if the projections hold. We have tightened our risk reduction strategies somewhat because of the more contagious variant and may do more in the 11th month of the pandemic. And I am hopeful that the trauma and drama from the top leadership of the US might be significantly reduced as President Biden takes office. We will all be healthier with less stress caused by the actions of our government day to day.

Most Memorable of 2020

Looking back on 2020 – there is so much that was different than prior years. There has not been a year of my life with so many significant types of upheaval: COVID-19 pandemic, environmental disasters (fires, hurricanes), racial strife, and strident politics. Today I am writing about the way this year was different for me as an individual with those upheavals as the broader situation.

Early year travel…then no travel. In prior years, I enjoyed travel throughout the year – being away from home a week or less at a time and daytrips. My original plan for 2020 was to spend a week of each month in Texas with my family. The early part of the year started out on that plan – a visit with family and a birding festival in Laredo, TX in late January and early February. We talked with an HHS person in the San Antonio airport; she was headed to the base where some of the first cruise ship passengers were arriving for their quarantine period. Once we got home, we hoped the virus was going to be limited to the few groups from cruise ships that were talked about in the news….and we started paying more attention. It quickly became apparent that telephone calls and Zoom meetings would have to take the place of the trips to Texas. We did some 2-3 hour outings for some outdoor time in the fall; we wore masks even outdoors and distanced from others; now that the infection rate is higher in our area and it’s often too cold to be outdoors for very long, we are not attempting more than walks around our neighborhood.

The Pandemic. By March, we had an inkling that COVID-19 was not going way and that there was more around in the community that anticipated. The grocery stories started having shortages of toilet paper and disinfecting products and hand sanitizer. Fortunately, we had an adequate supply of those to last until the stores had them again (although maybe not the brands we bought previously – what happened to Formula 409?). I went to an ‘over 65’ shopping hour at a local grocery in March and it was crowded enough that it scarred me into switching to grocery delivery for 2 months. I tried to keep 2-3 weeks of food in the house at all times. We bought over the counter medications that might help symptoms if we got sick. By the summer I was comfortable going to the grocery store again – masked and going at 6:30 AM every other week and, now, extending to every three weeks. We do curbside pickup at some local stores and restaurants. My husband has virtual and in-person appointments with his doctors, but we both delayed routine optometrist and dental checkups that started to be due; those appointments and my annual physical can wait until after we are vaccinated.

Cultural, environmental, and political drama. The pandemic would have made this a challenging year but with the cultural, environmental, and political drama happening as well – the news was overwhelmingly bad…traumatically bad. The trauma of seeing the murder of George Floyd by a policeman brought to the consciousness of the country that racial equality before the law is not something the US has achieved…and the varied response to the event showed us more about how deep the challenge runs in our culture…and highlighted other manifestations of inequality in our country. Because of our ‘stay at home’ strategy during the pandemic, we didn’t witness any unrest – but the news prompted some donations and solidified our votes in November. There were environmental disasters – fires in the west, hurricanes on the Gulf Coast; neither impacted us directly in Maryland, but it was very easy to be traumatized imaging how awful it must be for people trying to take precautions to not get COVID-19 but having to evacuate and then returning to find their home gone or damaged. The political drama – much of it seemingly intentionally done to sustain a level of chaos – continued through the end of the year; I became more angry as time went on that the leadership of the country – in a year of extreme national stress – seemed to be acting to increase the trauma.

Virtual birding festivals and conferences. I saved some positive things to write about for the last of this post….we all need something positive to sustain ourselves. My husband and I both enjoyed virtual birding festivals and conferences in 2020. They added variety to our weeks; we appreciated the work of the teams that made the transition to virtual because they took us away from our immediate environment (not quite as good as travel but the best we were going to do during the pandemic). We hope to be back to some in-person events in the second half of 2021. The ones we did virtually in 2020 were:

• May – Cape May Spring Festival (New Jersey)

• June – Mid-Atlantic Climate Change Education Conference

• July – Get into your sanctuary (NOAA)

• July and August – Sara Via Climate and Sustainability Webinars

• September – Yampa Valley Crane Festival (Colorado)

• September – Puget Sound Bird Fest (Washington)

• October – Cape May Fall Festival (New Jersey)

• October – Hawaii Island Festival of Birds

• November – Crane Fiesta (New Mexico)

• November – Patuxent River Conference Reflections

• December – Maryland Water Monitoring Conference

• December - AGU

At home. I spent more time at home this year than every before in my life (that I can remember…maybe I spent more time at home from birth to 4 years old). It’s been different but not hard. The house is well situated with forest to the back and a 30-year-old neighborhood street to the front with lots of trees as old as the houses; the views from the windows are all good – and there is wild life (birds (including an occasional wild turkey!), squirrels, deer, chipmunks, and racoons (seen only on the bird feeder cam in the wee hours of the morning)). Individuals and couples take walks…the neighborhood does not feel vacant or isolated. Inside - my husband and I have plenty of room to enjoy our individual projects/activities then be together for meals and shared activities…settling into a comfortable way of living in the house together and probably becoming more synchronized emotionally than we have since early in our marriage – simply because we are around each other more.

Conscious efforts to sustain healthy mental and physical health. As we’ve gotten older, we have become more intentional about our lifestyle – making sure we get enough exercise…eat healthy…assess our feeling and act to keep them positive. During this year – we have increased our focus. I had time to process the bounty of the CSA season (June-October) and am just now beginning to see that we have space in the freezer again. We eat well but keep our portion sizes reasonable; we haven’t gained weight…maybe we’ve lost a few pounds. We both try to get some outdoor time as frequently as we can – walks, yard work, reading on the deck, photography (stars/planets, sun, plants, animals, and snowflakes) etc. It was easier before it got cold. More of our exercise has shifted indoors at this point. We do things to brighten our mood – flowers, purchases to use for projects (mounted insects, clickers and magnifiers for cell phone photography), special pens, special food – things to make each day a little different.

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Overall – at the end of 2020, I am feeling optimistic about 2021 and pleased that my husband and I have responded with resilience to the changes in our lives during the past year. We had ups and downs but on the whole managed to sustain ourselves and to enjoy parts of every day (for me it was easier when the television was off, and I wasn’t reading my news feeds).

8 months in COVID-19 Pandemic

It’s a challenge to stay vigilant with masks…handwashing…distancing from other people – but even more important now with the cases spiking all over the country. Maryland is back to numbers we haven’t seen since June and the trend looks like it will go higher. The metrics that were established to open restaurants and bars are now indicating that the capacity needs to be reduced…and the governor did that this week.

My husband and I got our first haircut of the pandemic in mid-October; our logic was to get it before the anticipated increase in cases as people began spending more time indoors….anticipating that our next haircut would be after we are vaccinated. Our timing was good based on what is happening now…just 3 weeks later.

The CSA ended the third week in October. That was my only weekly errand away from the house and it was one I enjoyed. I am considering some kind of outdoor foray that I can do every week --- someplace not far from home…but a change of scenery once a week. The end of the CSA impacts my grocery shopping as well. I’ve already started buying more produce; it will increase as I clear out the veggies I froze over the course of the summer. I’ll still be shopping every other week rather than my pre-pandemic weekly habit; I’ve discovered that every other week works well for me.

After the CSA ended and I didn’t have a dusty gravel road to traverse, I got my car washed (drive thru) --- it’s a joy to have a clean car. It’s good for the winter now. I also bought gas – the first tank since January. So now I am back to charging the car and doing my driving as an EV. It was low risk since everything was self-service and I wore a mask just in case someone else pulled into the slot next to me; and used hand sanitizer after I got gas…and after I put the code in for the car wash. My car is probably set with fuel and maintenance until after the vaccination is available.

I had a porch full of stuff to donate. It feels good to get rid of items we no longer need. We also made a trip to the county landfill for some larger trash items and hazardous waste (large fluorescent bulbs). The charities and county facility are probably at lower capacity but functional at this point. Their processes for protecting their employees and the public are established.

My husband and his doctor have changed his prescriptions from mail delivery to pickup at a local pharmacy based on the challenges with timely delivery from the postal service in our area. I’m not sure if this is related to the pandemic at all…but it is all happening at the same time. There are layers of anxiety that sometimes are separate…but tend to meld together over time, stretching our ability to cope with more and more and more.

We made a field trip to Howard County Conservancy’s Mt Pleasant for birding. It was outdoors, small group, distanced, mostly masked. It was OK…but now that the cases in our state are spiking, we might not do something like that again. We can still go to places like that but just on our own.

There were joys of virtual events over the past month. My favorite was the Hawaii Island Festival of Birds. It was good for the moment…and gave me ideas about the future…things I want to do post-pandemic.

It’s fall. We thought we would take some fall foliage drives but we missed the peak so the main fall activity has been mowing leaves in our yard! Still – the continuity of the natural cycle is something that buoys my spirits.

Right now, I am aware that there are multiple anxieties beyond the pandemic. After 8 months – the pandemic is the one I am coping with the best; I know how to reduce my risk and I have developed habits that are easy to maintain because they incorporate activities in my every day activities that are joyful…it is easily sustainable until the vaccine is available.

My hope for the next few weeks is that several of the other anxieties will reduce dramatically (since I have not discovered good ways to cope with them – who would have guessed that the transition from one US President to the next would be so fraught) and that we’ll be settling in for Thanksgiving and then Christmas with lots of virtual interactions with far flung family and the usual good food/decorations…savoring home and health…looking forward to a post-pandemic sometime in 2021.

Sunflowers

I needed cheering up….so I bought some sunflowers from the grocery shopping. The stems were very long so I cut them a bit when I got them home and put them with the last of the anise/fennel flowers from the CSA (all that is left of those cut flowers). And then they were ready for a photo shoot out on the deck in the sunshine. Hope the photos brighten your day as much as the flowers themselves (and the photography activity) did for me….and I still have the flowers on the island in my kitchen to enjoy for the next week or so.

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Through the Window, JMW Turner, and Being Outdoors

Continuing the blog post series prompted by COVID-19….

Pictures through the Window

I always try to gather up the best pictures taken through my office window toward the end of the month. We had more birds at the feeder at the beginning of the month; it was cool and there weren’t as many insects for the omnivorous birds. There are 11 birds in all….and a tree… in the collection for May 2020.

The Red-bellied Woodpeckers are frequent visitors. The male even did some foraging on the ground under our neighbor’s pines.

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The female has started getting a seed from the feeder then wedging it in a nearby crack in the deck railing to peck and crack open. There are times I think she knows I am watching.

The Cowbirds are still around. The males come in groups, but the female is the one I see at the feeder most often.

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The Downy Woodpecker comes frequently as well although it comes in silent – unlike the red-bellies.

The finches (House and Gold) are around – but less frequently than they were in April. I’m not sure why other than they are busy with their nests and finding other food sources.

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And then there were the Indigo Buntings. They were somewhere else by mid-month.

The Cardinal pair is around all through the year.

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The only picture of a Titmouse I took this month was a very round bird. Maybe it was just the angle.

The Carolina Wrens are the big singers around our deck.

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The Mourning Doves sometimes use the deck railing for a mating platform. I didn’t know what the bird I photographed was doing with its tail, but I suspected it was mating related. It was the only dove around…it eventually stood up and flew off.

Recently we’ve had an uptick in House Sparrows coming to the feeder. They seem to come in small groups of 2-4 birds. Maybe they are gearing up for a second brood of the season.

Finally, is the tulip poplar. The later-than-usual frosts we had this year didn’t seem to reduce the number of flowers. We’ll have plenty of gutter-clogging seeds flying next winter, and spring!

Unique activities for yesterday:

Gorging on JMW Turner (1775-1851) art. 344 paintings are packed in a slideshow available from Internet Archive here. Wow…what a range of works he produced. I selected 4 different works as examples. The slide show is well worth a look.

Being Outdoors. I’ve established a new goal – be outdoors for at least an hour every day. This time of year, that should not be hard since the weather is relatively pleasant. This is more about increasing consistency and logging what I do than dramatically increasing my outdoor time…although I tend let weather deter my getting out. I know I feel better physically and emotionally on days I am outdoors for at least an hour. As it gets hotter, I’ll shift to the morning – before the heat of the day becomes oppressive. It doesn’t have to be working in the yard, taking a walk, or hiking in the forest behind out house. It can be reading a book, doing something on my laptop or just enjoying some quality time with our cat on the enclosed/screened deck! In my first foray after establishing the goal, I selected pictures for this blog post, made two Zentangle tiles for the Zentangle prompt, cleaned the table on the deck, occasionally made eye contact with the cat, and cleaned out/filled the birdbaths…and it added up to more than an hour - easy.

A Zentangle Prompt

Try the SeZ pattern. The pattern starts by using seeds (maybe real ones like sesame or rice or bulgur wheat) or making random dots.

Here is a page I made based on yesterday’s prompt: Experiment with the MAELSTROM pattern. I used the May 2020 page from the Audubon calendar. It provided lots of spaces to experiment with the pattern. I tend to like the random usage of the pattern…and the curved part of the pattern although I did start thinking about radio waves coming down to a radio telescope for the other part of the pattern. Using the calendar page was a good experience and I’m thinking of using the page for June to show the prompt for each day…maybe showing the page as I fill  in each week as we move through the month.

Links to my previous “filling a day of social distance” posts  here.

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The Zentangle® Method is an easy-to-learn, relaxing, and fun way to create beautiful images by drawing structured patterns. It was created by Rick Roberts and Maria Thomas. "Zentangle" is a registered trademark of Zentangle, Inc. Learn more at zentangle.com.

Filling a Day of Social Distance – 4/28/2020 – Little Celebrations

Continuing the blog post series prompted by COVID-19….

Here are the unique activities for yesterday:

Making echinoderm prompted Zentangle® tiles. Jurassic echinoderms France is full of plates and worth browsing; it’s available on Internet Archive here. Four sample images are below. I’ve only made one Zentangle so far but I’m sure the patterns will pop up in the tiles I make over the next few days.

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Starting the What is Contemporary Art? Coursera course. It is my 3rd class from MoMA. For some reason – I am interested in classes that are different from my typical science or history classes I’ve taken in non-pandemic years.

Watching a Glenn Randall Photography webinar on light for landscape photographers. It was something my husband found out about and set up for us. We watched on the television in the den. Now I have some vocabulary for some of the type of light I enjoy early or late in the day! I realized that some of the wonderful light on the sandhill cranes in the early mornings at Bosque del Apache is ‘glow light’ from the sun 20 minutes away from coming up behind us.

Making sweet potato custard. Probably my favorite food creation during our ‘stay at home as much as possible’ time has been sweet potato custard. This is the second time I’ve made it. I cook the sweet potato in the oven when we are baking something else…then peel it and save it in the refrigerator until I’m ready to make the custard. The sweet potato goes into the Ninja food processor with 4 eggs, 1 teaspoon cinnamon, 1/2 teaspoon ginger, 1/4 teaspoon cloves and 1/2 to 3/4 cup sugar (this time I was trying to use up some powdered sugar so I used the higher amount). After processing and scrapping down the sides, I add in enough almond milk to make the consistency about right….processing again to get it thoroughly blended. After pouring it into the backing dish, I cover the top with chopped pecans. It cooks for 15 minutes at 425 degrees and 30 minutes at 350 degrees.

It never lasts long since both my husband and I like it a lot.

Links to my previous “filling a day of social distance” posts  here.

And now for the monthly post about 10 little celebrations. Again – the overwhelming celebration (the same as in March) is that in April 2020

Everyone in my family (in Maryland, Missouri, and Texas) is well…and taking all the recommended precautions to stay that way.

Now for 9 other celebrations….all from home (or easy walking distance):

Talking to family far away. It’s such a boost to talk with family – know that they are doing fine – that we all have pleasant homes and a few people with us. It’s good to let whatever anxiety has accumulated to melt away and celebrate family.

Grocery delivery. At first the idea of grocery delivery made me anxious. Now I find that the arrival of another delivery to our front porch is a cause for celebration. We have good food at low health risk.

Fashion as Design Coursera course. The whole course was interesting. I learned a lot more – and maybe differently – that I anticipated. I celebrated the whole course.

My history in wardrobe terms. The Fashion as Design prompted a whole project - thinking about my wardrobe from the 1960s to today. It was a fun project and I celebrated the memory of my favorite clothes.

Life in the Universe Pandemic Series. I’m a fan of Charles Cockell’s mini-lectures on astrobiology and I enjoyed his book (Bruntsfield Brook) as well. I watch/listen to the videos in clumps…glad I became aware of them shortly after he started.

Hiking into the forest. The whole hike was one big celebration. I am already looking at the forecast and planning another hike.

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And then there are three birds I am highlighting as April celebrations: rose-breasted grosbeak, piliated woodpecker, and goldfinch. I celebrate the view from my office window each and every day. It is becoming a wall of green now that the trees are leafing out.

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The Zentangle® Method is an easy-to-learn, relaxing, and fun way to create beautiful images by drawing structured patterns. It was created by Rick Roberts and Maria Thomas. "Zentangle" is a registered trademark of Zentangle, Inc. Learn more at zentangle.com.

Filling a Day of Social Distance – 3/22/2020

Continuing the blog post series prompted by COVID-19….

Here are the unique activities for yesterday:

Trying macro photographs of spicebush and red maple. My original plan was to tromp through the backyard and into the woods…do the photography outdoors. But – it was colder and breezier than I anticipated so I cut a small spicebush branch and picked up a twig of red maple samaras that had blown off. The photography part of the project would be done inside.

I worked with the red maple samaras first. I used a jeweler’s loupe and my cell phone with the samara on my kitchen countertop…a small flash light supplementing the natural light coming from one side. I like the graceful ridges in the ‘wings.’

Then I ‘got close’ with my Canon point-and-shoot camera….let its macro setting do it’s best. These are small immature samaras…about 1/4 inch.

The spice bush flowers are small too. I put the branch in a vase (with the sycamore branch). I might get to see its leaves unfurl too…after the flowers are done. I noticed an ant on the branch as I put it in the water. Can ants be pollinators?

I tried several approaches to photographing the small flowers. The ones below were done with the clip-on macro lens on my phone. The challenge is the shallow depth of field. These flowers are small but not flat!

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Then I tried putting my Canon bridge camera on a tripod across the kitchen and using the zoom. It blurs the background and provides more depth…but the color is gone. Maybe I’ll put more light on the flowers and try again. The sycamore buds might benefit from the same photographic strategy. My husband gets into the action too – helping me with the more complicated set ups.

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Catching up on the Cincinnati Zoo Home Safari videos:

• Moe the two-toed sloth

• Lions Imani and John

• Penguins (in a very noisy habitat…I didn’t watch the whole thing)

• Seyial the black rhino

Completing the Jackson Pollock segment of the In the Studio: Postwar Abstract Painting Coursera course. I’ve been doing one ‘week’ of the course every day and enjoying all of them – particularly the part about learning how they were made.

Re-assessing our investment strategy…making some changes. At first, we thought that maybe the social distancing strategy would work, and the economy would blip but recover soon. Not enough people are following the guidance – it says something very sad about us as a nation – and means that the pandemic with be more overwhelming. From an economic standpoint, it is more than a blip and deteriorating further. So we made some investment changes to stabilize rather than free fall…..continuing our social distancing…and hoping that the tests of potential therapeutic drugs work well enough to save lives and shorten the time people are in the hospital to recover. Both my husband and I fell of the wagon of limiting time spent following the coronavirus stories and statistics yesterday…back to limiting that activity today – no one needs a constant pounding of repeating bad news.

Previous “filling a day of social distance” posts: 3/15, 3/16, 3/17, 3/18, 3/19, 3/20

Gleanings of the Week Ending October 26, 2019

The items below were ‘the cream’ of the articles and websites I found this past week. Click on the light green text to look at the article.

Scientists Find Way to Fully Recycle Plastics Without Losing Quality - Yale E360 – I hope this process undercuts plastic manufacturing from fossil fuels…plastics should not be the glide path for the oil companies! The heating of the plastic to 850 degrees for this process should be done with renewable energy. And what happens to the parts that don’t get recycled (I assume there is waste from the things that weren’t plastic that got into the stream (i.e. ‘dirty’ containers).

Top 25 Wild Bird Photographs of the Week: Bird Interactions – National Geographic Society Newsroom – Birds with other birds (not always the same species).

Maya Tomb of the Unknown Red Queen - Red from cinnabar (mercuric sulfide) power that covered everything inside the limestone sarcophagus…a mask of malachite.

Time Spent in Nature Is Good for You | The Scientist Magazine® - Spending at least 2 hours in nature per week is strongly correlated with self-reports of being in good health and having high well-being…..based on a study in the UK with 20,000 participants between 2014 and 2016. Intuitively – the idea seems right. But what does ‘time spent in nature’ really mean and what is it that causes the correlation? Do you have to be outdoors or is viewing it enough? I am outdoors in beautiful natural places (gardens, forests, seashores, rivers and lakes) so frequently…the 2 hours per week is at the low end for me…except for the coldest or wettest weeks.

Cooking food alters the microbiome: Raw vs. cooked diets have distinct effects on both mouse and human gut microbes -- ScienceDaily – No recommendations from this research but lots of prompts for further research.

The Short List Of Climate Actions That Will Work | CleanTechnica – These are country or continent type actions like: electrify everything, overbuild renewable generation, build continent-scale electrical grids and marks, fix concrete, change agricultural practices, shut down coal and gas generation aggressively. Some of them can be impacted by individual decisions…to move in the direction. For example – 1) The CSA I belong is on a path to not use plastic to control weeds and retain moisture around their crops. 2) The next house I buy (in the next 2-3 years) will be all electric and have solar panels…maybe battery storage too….maybe geothermal heating/cooling. 3) The next car I buy will be an EV rather than a plug-in hybrid like I have now. And I can change my yard into a mini-forest (of redbuds, dogwoods, spice bush, hollies….not huge trees but ones that are native to the area where I live).

Air Pollution May Damage People's Brains | The Scientist Magazine® - Mortality, respiratory health, cognition, and social behavior. This is scary. This is yet another reason to move away from fossil fuels.

Humankind did not live with a high-carbon dioxide atmosphere until 1965 -- ScienceDaily – I was in 5th grade in 1965. It was the grade between two memorable events: seeing a tornado just before it touched the ground and traveling with my parents to Mexico City for a weeklong vacation (two firsts: on an airplane…and out of the US). But the cross over to a high-carbon dioxide atmosphere has the greater long-term impact. I already suspect that unless something changes dramatically, climate change by midcentury will probably shorten my life.

Ailing U.S. pecan industry calls on India to reduce tariffs - UPI.com – I couldn’t find an update on this story from a few weeks ago. Evidently China used to buy 40% of the pecan crop in the US but now there is a tariff and the market is gone. So, the farmers are trying to develop the Indian market. It’s been tough to be a farmer for many years…but the tariffs have added even greater challenges.

Stressed out: Americans making themselves sick over politics: One in five report lost sleep, damaged friendships -- ScienceDaily – If individuals are stressed by politics….hopefully they’ll realize that it’s time to implement strategies to reduce the stress. Spending less time on ‘news’ would provide time to shift focus to other aspects of life – skew toward activities that make you happy and help others too. ‘Staying informed’ of politics 24/7 should not be a priority (although participating in elections should be).