Gardens Aglow Vicariously

I am in Carrollton, Texas this December working with my sisters as we increase the daily assistance for my parents. It is going to be a very different December this year. The yearly tradition (started last year…our first December after moving to the Springfield MO area) of walking through the Springfield Botanical Gardens Gardens Aglow display will be a vicarious one for me this year. My husband and daughter did the walk last week and sent pictures.

It was a drizzly night so they both just used their phones rather than more expensive cameras. There were not many people walking the garden (probably because it was wet) so the pictures don’t have as many silhouettes of people as we had last year. The pictures put me in a holiday mood….even while I accept – even savor - that I am where I need to be, doing what I need to do here in Carrollton this December.

Ten Little Celebrations – November 2023

November has been a more emotional month that usual…there are some little celebrations on my list for the month that seem normal….but others that reflect the rapid changes occurring with one of my parents.

90+ birthday. Both of my parents are approaching their mid-90s and my family tries to celebrate each birthday (realizing that it could be the last). The one that happened in November was celebrated over 3 days to avoid exhausting them both. I got to be there for all three days since I stay in their home when I am in Carrollton.

Birds at the feeder (after we unclogged them). I unclogged bird feeders at both Carrollton and my home in Missouri…celebrated when the birds quickly discovered that the seed was available again.

A cool sunny day. I had grass and leaves to mow…celebrated the sunny afternoon that was not too cold for the activity. It was one of the most enjoyable mowing experiences of the season!

Twigs burned/millet planted. I had other yard work to accomplish as part of fall clean up in my yard and there was an excellent day to get it done. I burned the accumulated twigs (savoring the heat produced) and put the millet seed heads in strategic places so that (maybe) plants will grow next summer. My husband helped me store all the tools that had been out under the deck for quick access during the summer. We both celebrated the completion of our preparations for winter.

A good nap today. I drove from Missouri to Carrollton the day after my parent entered the hospital and immediately went to the hospital to stay with them overnight. My sister arrived the next morning to spend the next 24 hours helping the parent in the hospitals and I managed to drive to my parents’ house….and celebrated another sister being there to fix lunch so that I could nap. I went completely to sleep…got a full 90 minute sleep cycle in 100 minutes….celebrated feeling so much better afterward.

Bluebird at Josey Ranch. Seeing the bluebird at Josey Ranch was a boost to my mental outlook. I celebrated that I was savvy enough to know that nature often does that for me…and to stop at Josey Ranch on my way from the hospital to my parents’ house.

A parent coming home from the hospital. The sunrise I noticed at the hospital was a good start on the day my parent was projected to come home from the hospital. I celebrated the beauty at the beginning of the day…glad that the homecoming occurred later in the day.

The home health nurse coming for a 1st visit. I celebrated that we got a visit from the home health nurse on the Friday after Thanksgiving (i.e. we didn’t have to wait for the week after Thanksgiving)!

The time I have with my parents now….being in the present. I celebrate the time I am having with both parents now. Appreciating joys in every day shared with them.

Thanksgiving. The holiday was very different this year. I spent it with my parents and having various family bring special foods throughout the weekend rather than one huge meal. Gratitude is integrated with all my other emotions right now…and I celebrate that it is. It makes everything else easier.

Happy Thanksgiving!

I had big plans for Thanksgiving at my home in Missouri – sharing a meal with my daughter and son-in-law. The planned menu was: pumpkin soup, balsamic vinaigrette baked chicken, sauteed green beans with sesame seeds, spicy cornbread (with cheese and whole kernel corn), apple cranberry crisp. With everyone contributing some part of the feast (but all cooked in my kitchen).

But the plan was overtaken by the reality of a parent in a Texas hospital and them coming home just in time for the holiday. The change has only made my thanksgiving more profound this year; I am thankful that my parent survived a near death event more than a decade ago – there are so many wonderful shared memories of those years! And we’ll savor whatever new memories we can make this Thanksgiving!

Happy Thanksgiving to us all.

1897 Montgomery Ward’s Common Sense Cookery

In 1897, Montgomery Ward & Co. was a world-pioneering mail-order business. Its first serious competition (Sears) had opened the year before.

They also published a book about cooking in 1897 that is available via Internet Archive. The title page indicates it is about more than just recipes: what to eat and how to prepare it, hygienic and scientific cooking!

They also published a book about cooking in 1897 that is available via Internet Archive. The title page indicates it is about more than just recipes: what to eat and how to prepare it, hygienic and scientific cooking!

The illustrations try to show the ideal of food preparation and enjoyment in the late 1800s.

Montgomery Ward & co.'s Common Sense Cookery

My mother remembers her parents ordering from Montgomery Ward in the 1930s for Christmas presents. I remember looking at their catalogs in the 1960s although I also looked at Sears catalogs.

I remember two other books from Wards.

One was the Wendy Ward Charm Book from the 1960s. It was full of somewhat dated information for teenaged girls; much of it we absorbed then jettisoned the parts that didn’t work for us as we entered the work force in the 1970s (the “I am Woman” era).

The other was the book written by Robert L. May on assignment to Montgomery Ward 1939 – the creation of Rudolph, the Red-nosed Reindeer. I bought a copy for my daughter in the early 1990s from Wards! It can be checked out from Internet Archive here.

12 years of Blog Anniversary

This blog started in November 2011…just after I made the decision to retire. 12 years have certainly been full of new adventures…a satisfying mix of days that were challenging and full of activity … also plenty to savor and enjoy. The blog helped me document much of what happened.

Last year I documented the changes within the blog over the first 11 years so I won’t repeat that. The main change over the past year has been my more regular visits to Carrollton, TX that resulted in a monthly visits to Hagerman National Wildlife Refuge (near Sherman TX), observations in my parents’ yard, and the birds at a park in Carrollton….and subsequent blog posts. There were also 1st visits to many places close to where we moved in Missouri that became fodder for blog posts as well.

I am anticipating that the 13th year of the blog will document our return to attending birding festivals and include more posts about elder care…documenting the journey my sisters and I have with our parents.

Previous anniversary posts: 11th anniversary, 10th anniversary

Ten Little Celebrations – October 2023

Continuing deeper into fall…celebrating the seasonal changes!

Fall days – sunny and cool. A great time of year to get outdoors…perfect temperatures and blasts of color.

American White Pelicans. Seen in two places: Hagerman National Wildlife Refuge (Texas) and Sequoyah State Park (Oklahoma). It’s migration time. These are big birds that are fun to watch on the water and in the air. I always celebrate seeing them.

Apple Crisp. One of my favorite ways to use the fall apple harvest. It’s a little splurge on my diet…but well worth it.

First chili of the season. Another seasonal favorite.

Getting registered for an early winter birding festival. We signed in on the first day of registration and found that one of the sessions we wanted was already full; we picked an alternative and celebrated our itinerary when the registration process was complete. We are anticipating a wonderful week in December!

Butterflies and milkweed at Lake Springfield boathouse. Migrating monarchs and pipevine butterflies on thistles….milkweed seeds spilling out of pods…some favorite fall sightings.

Successful cleanup of my daughter’s fall yard (part 1). This is the second year I have offered to help my daughter do some fall yard cleanup. Our first work session was in October this year. I celebrated how much we got done in just few hours….we work well together! I am anticipating a second session in November.

Virginia creeper turned red. I let the Virginia Creeper grow in my front flower bed…spill over the low rock wall….and am celebrating that it has now turned red! Hurray for native plant fall colors!

Miniature pumpkin harvest. I was pleasantly surprised that my miniature pumpkin vines produced lots of pumpkins. As I harvested them, I celebrated the season…and the natural decorations for my breakfast table.

Company and fall cleaning. I had company twice during October and am celebrating their visits AND that the visits acted as an incentive to get my house cleaner and picked up going into the coming holiday season.

Ten Little Celebrations – September 2023

Welcoming cooler temperatures…the beginning of fall. Lots to celebrate!

Shaw Nature Reserve. A first visit…a short hike. Celebrating the place and an early fall day with my daughter.

Pawpaw. Celebrating a new fruit…and its native to North America. I planted the seeds; maybe they’ll come up next spring/summer and I’ll have pawpaws from my yard in 5-7 years.

Wood Duck in an Egret picture. I was taking a picture of an egret catching a fish but celebrated the wood duck in the background when I looked at the image on a big monitor!

Pineapple Whip. Celebrating a birthday with a unique-to-Springfield MO treat!

New addition for my travel computer. Celebrating a new mouse, mini-keyboard, and portable monitor to travel with my laptop. It will make packing easier and using my laptop more comfortable for my week in Texas every month.

Yellow/orange Watermelon. Cutting the watermelon, we got from our CSA revealed something different than the usual red! I celebrated a great watermelon and the memory of the yellow watermelon that my paternal grandparents grew (along with red ones) during my childhood.

Green Heron at the Neighborhood Pond. Surprise! The bird was hiding in plain sight, but I didn’t see it until it flew…and celebrated that I was able to photograph it in the place where it landed. Green herons are one of my favorite birds to watch because they can change their shape (extending or contracting their neck) so quickly.

Beautyberry. Buying a beautyberry for my yard had been on my list for a bit….I celebrated that I found one at the Shaw Nature Reserve’s Wildflower Festival.

Vaccinations. My husband and I celebrated that we could easily schedule getting both the updated flu and COVID-19 vaccinations…increasing our confidence of staying well as we travel more this fall.

5 Native Plants. I celebrated when I got the 5 new native plants in the ground…and they seem to be doing well in my yard.

Fall Activities

September is the beginning of fall activities. I am doing some fall cleaning inside the house and doing the last plantings in the yard (hoping the plants will be well established before the first frost). The Indian Corn is on the front door.

There are more events scheduled in our area now that the temperatures are a bit cooler. We trekked to Shaw Nature Reserve near St. Louis for their plant sale, bought puzzles at the Friends of the Greene County Library book sale, and walked through Cider Days in Springfield (enjoyed a Pineapple Whip as we walked…being part of a Saturday morning crowd) then enjoyed a BBQ lunch as a new place. My daughter went to an evening Brew at the Zoo; my husband and I enjoyed it vicariously – learning that the lions and other big cats were very active as it got dark…the lions ‘caroling.’ Toward the end of the month, my husband and I made a quick trip to St. Louis – another visit to the Missouri Botanical Garden (and their Chihuly glass) and the Sophia M. Sachs Butterfly House….blog posts coming soon re that adventure.

And we are anticipating more travel in the next few months (other than the monthly week in Texas) – a fall foliage trip to a state park in Oklahoma…a birding festival in New Mexico. Overall, fall is a great time of year to be out and about – between the heat of summer and the cold of winter; it is often the ‘just right’ season of the year!

Ten Little Celebrations – August 2023

Hot summer…plenty to celebrate indoors and out!

Kohlrabi. I rediscovered how much I like kohlrabi after a big one came with my first CSA delivery (more on that later). A quarter was a serving in stir fries and salads. Celebrating another great veggie!

High protein brownies. Wow! 15 grams of protein in a good tasting brownie…worth celebrating. I’ll use this recipe again and again.

Neon cardstock and new pens. My version of celebrating the start of the school year (fall) - new Zentangle supplies!

Rainy days. The rains that came broke the high heat…I celebrated and enjoyed an indoors day. It was great to be able to turn off the sprinkler system for about a week!

Brooklyn Duo.  Celebrated finding Brooklyn Duo on YouTube – music that enhances every day!

Dickerson Park Zoo. Enjoyed our first walk around before the heat of the day got overwhelming…celebrated that it is local to us!

Indigo Bunting. Indigo buntings successfully nested in a bird box near Lake Springfield Boathouse. Celebrating seeing a parent arrive with a caterpillar for the nestlings!

OSU Botanical Garden. A morning walkabout in a botanical garden. Celebrating and appreciating it after attending a funeral the previous day.

Finishing mowing the whole yard. The morning was cool enough that I managed to mow the whole yard rather than splitting it into a 2-morning effort. I celebrated when it was done!

Hummingbird moth. Finding a snowberry clearwing (hummingbird moth) on my pumpkin vine was a pleasant surprise…celebrating the jewel-like insect almost hidden in the green leaves.

Ten Little Celebrations – July 2023

Celebrating is often linked with appreciation. When I notice that I am celebrating something – I almost always notice that I appreciate that it happened or how beautiful it is…or just that it is a brilliant positive in my day.   Noticing little things to celebrate/appreciate every day is a habit that builds mental resilience!

Miniature pumpkins on the vine. I planted the seeds back in May, not confident that they would be more than vines. They started to bloom – and I enjoyed the flowers. I am celebrating the recognizable little pumpkins now.

A new low weight of the year. Slowly but surely…I am getting to the ‘normal’ weight for my height. Every time I reach a new low for the year, I celebrate!

Ozark (Missouri) farmers market. I was overwhelmed by the crowd at the farmers market in Springfield and underwhelmed by the sparse number of vendors in Nixa. I celebrated that the Ozark farmers market was the Goldilocks (i.e. ‘just right’).

2 ‘hens and chicks’ planted. I finally planted something new in the front flower bed; it wasn’t a simple task since it required moving rock and cutting away landscaping fabric underneath. I celebrated the completed project…and am enjoying the anticipation of ‘chicks’ appearing before fall.

Getting the lawn mowed. Avoiding high temperatures…rain..heavy due. I celebrated that the night was dry, the light dew in the morning, and the temperatures still in the 70s when I did the mowing.

Intensity minutes while gardening. This summer I have increased my ‘intensity minutes’ rather than simply sustaining my low sedentary time. Mowing generally results in ‘intensity minutes’…but I celebrated when some of my general gardening did too!

Lake Springfield meadow. There is something different to celebrate every time I go. In July the uptick in dragonflies and butterflies was the high-point.

Sprinklers all working. We noticed that one zone of our sprinkler system was not working when the grass started turning brown…so we celebrated when it was fixed (and also that we got rain too) and the grass started its recovery.

Rounding of 3 corners in our yard. I had an idea to round the corners of our yard to make mowing easier (curves rather than right angles) and celebrated that the actions I took for 3 corners (planting some and putting down landscaping cloth to kill grass so that I can plant something) is working!

Test at doctors office shows all OK. Its always worth celebrating when a test comes back with the desired result….of course, with some measure of relief too.

Balloon Glow

I missed an annual event near my home in Missouri while I was Carrollton TX in June – a balloon glow (where tethered hot air balloons are inflated at dusk at a local park as part of a summer festival). My husband and daughter decided to attend at the last minute after afternoon thunderstorms ended…and sent pictures! It was great to be able to enjoy the event vicariously (and maybe also good not to be slogging through a muddy field). But – I am determined pay attention to the scheduling of the event and be there rather than in Texas in 2024!

Ten Little Celebrations – June 2023

Every day brings multiple little celebrations…I choose one to log for the day and then select 10 each month to savor in this post.

One year anniversary for our Missoure home. June 2022 is when we moved to Missouri. We’ve settled into the house and I’ve confirmed that my favorite room in the house is my office…just as it was in the Maryland house. The house itself and being closer to family have confirmed again and again that we made a good decision to move when did! So we are celebrating the anniversary.

Dishwasher and sprinkler system working. Of course, every house needs maintenance…in June both our dishwasher and sprinkler system had problems (dishwasher leaked water and the sprinkler system developed a broken head/pipe after the grinding of the pine stump). Fortunately, both were easily fixed (rather than an expensive replacement) and we celebrated that they are functioning again.

Internet/TV/phones working. Shortly after I got to my parents’ home in Carrollton, their internet and TV and phones failed. We had a painful 4 days….celebrated when the tech finally came and replaced their outside box (it was at least 18 years old!).

Scissor-tail at Josey Ranch. Celebrated when I saw a scissor-tailed flycatcher while I was out of my car with camera in hand!

Ducklings at Josey Ranch. Celebrated seeing newly hatched ducklings with a mom trying to protect them from turtles!

Seeing beautyberry flowering. I had previously only noticed beautyberry plants after they had their purple berries. This June I celebrated knowing where the plants grew so I could see the flowers.

Trimming all the dead parts out of crape myrtle and rose buses. It was a daunting task because it seemed like there was so much to trim. It got a little better when I discovered that my gauntlet gloves worked (not thorn pricks from the roses) and that the dead twigs/branches would burn easily. I celebrated when the task was completed…felt like I had accomplished a lot in getting my yard looking better for the summer.

Buying a fragrant sumac (native plant sale). I celebrated my first native plant addition to my landscaping…there will be more through the years.

Homemade marinade with balsamic vinegar. Celebrating trying a new recipe and realizing that I will never need to buy bottle mariade again!

Road trip to St. Louis. Celebrating another road trip with my daughter! Blog posts coming up re our adventure.

Ten Little Celebrations – May 2023

I picked my 10 little celebrations for May…then grouped them in to 3 categories: playing tourist (5), emotional experience (3) and getting outdoors (2). There was a lot to celebrate in May!

ArtsFest in Springfield. An interesting event and great weather too. We went with my daughter and son-in-law. I had heard about it in previous years from my daughter but it was my first time to experience it. It was a way to celebrate great spring weather and the artists of the area.

Springfield Botanical Gardens/Mizumoto Japanese Stroll Garden. Another way to celebrate springtime…savor the flowers…the new growth everywhere.

Fantastic Caverns. The easiest way to tour a cave…riding on a tram. I celebrated that this one had visible fossils in the ceiling that were visible too.

Springfield Art Museum. I celebrated the pottery/ceramics which is the focus of one of the exhibits now. Somehow art that has the potential to be something functional always appeals to me.  

World of Wildlife Museum and Aquarium. Celebrating the improvements in presentation of taxidermied specimens (meticulous attention to the depiction of the ecosystem around the animal)….and best aquarium in this part of the country!

Mother’s Day. A hearty breakfast then a hike alongside a meadow with my daughter…celebrating the relationship (and motherhood).


A sister’s successful surgery. Health of ourselves and people we have close relationships is always somewhat emotion. It’s great to be able to celebrate a procedure that was successful.

In-range blood work results. I celebrated some recent blood work that indicated that everything being checked was in the normal range. As we get older, we tend to be more aware that there could be some challenges ahead…and it is reassuring when the results indicate everything is still fine.

Coopers hawk over the Pocket Prairie. It’s always startling to see a raptor in a suburban area. I heard the racket of other birds before I saw the hawk swoop over the pocket prairie at Josey Ranch and into the neighborhood across the street. I celebrated that these small hawks evidently have thrived in that environment.

Rhododendron Flowering. I missed the rhododendron blooming last year…was thrilled when the flowers opened. It was a big part of the celebration of spring in our back yard!

Ten Little Celebrations – April 2023

Glorious spring…cool mornings and very pleasant afternoons…flowers…travel. So much to celebrate.

Springfield Botanical Garden and Mizumoto Japanese Stroll Garden. Visiting gardens is one of my favorite spring activities! There is so much to see and celebrate as the gardens come back from winter…blooms abound.

Finding a lost ring in a gardening glove.  I celebrated finding a ring I thought I had lost in the tip of a gardening glove finger. It must have some off with the glove and then pushed to the tip when I put on the glove the next time. It was lost for over a month before I finally realized there was something in the end of glove finger!

Ducklings on the neighborhood pond. Another sign of spring – baby birds. The ducklings were all staying close to their parent…still tiny enough to be vulnerable to turtle predation.

Getting to Pensacola FL. We took our first multi-day vacation since before the pandemic. The drive to Pensacola took us longer than we anticipated but we made it. More posts about our adventures in the week ahead. We both celebrated when we got to the hotel after 13 hours on the road.

Indigo buntings. A small flock of indigo buntings was enjoying the grass/weed area near some buildings in Gulf Islands National Seashore….more than I had ever seen at one time! Celebrated noticing the small birds with vibrant coloring.

Home again. It always feels good to come home again after being away. It happened twice in April: once when I can back from Texas and the again when I returned from Florida. Celebrating being at home.

Mowing the yard. I celebrated that the new yard and new mower are going to be a positive learning experience during the growing season – the yard looks great and the work is helping me build up my stamina, get some ‘intensity minutes’ into my routine.

Forsythia with composting mulch. The idea to pull some none flowering weeds as mulch under the forsythia where there was bare soil has worked beautifully. I celebrated finding a place in the yard to put cut/pulled vegetation rather than taking it to the recycling facility.

Great day to put out mulch around trees in the front yard. After mowing the front yard the first time, I realized the trees needed mulch under them to make mowing eaiser. I celebrated that we had great weather on the day we bought the mulch and were able to complete mulching the trees in the front yard…and celebrated again every subsequent mowing.

Great day to put out mulch around trees in the front yard. After mowing the front yard the first time, I realized the trees needed mulch under them to make mowing eaiser. I celebrated that we had great weather on the day we bought the mulch and were able to complete mulching the trees in the front yard…and celebrated again every subsequent mowing.

Planting bulbs around the red maples. I realized that the mulch around the trees made it easier to plant bulbs too. I planted some summer blooming flowers – lilies and butterfly weed and gladiolas. I celebrated that it was so easy to do…and will be celebrating again when the plants bloom this summer.

National Tiger Sanctuary

The National Tiger Sanctuary is only about 30 minutes from our Missouri home; a tram tour of the place on a sunny spring day was a great ‘experience’ for a spring birthday in our family. We arrived about twenty minutes before our tour time…plenty of time to photograph the sculpture above the gate

And sculptures around the building.

There was also a pile of damaged big cat ‘toys’ behind the building.

The tram tour passes between rows of large double/triple wire enclosures – sometimes for single big cats and sometimes shared spaces for siblings or cats that appreciate company. The cats looked healthy although some are hampered by their experience prior to being rescued (i.e. declawed, teeth filed, finicky eaters). Even though the name is ‘tiger sanctuary’ we saw more lions! There have been two ‘surprise’ litters born at a sanctuary (a group of rescued adult lions…the male supposedly had a vasectomy…but two lionesses were having litters!). The litters were 4 cubs each and are almost adults now…so the numbers are skewed toward lions.

We heard vocalizations of cats several times while we were there. Our tour guide said that cool days in spring and fall are not as smelly as warm, humid days. Good to know…made us even more glad we went in April.

There were white tigers and ligers – rescued from breeders or entertainment companies. They tend to have genetic-type health problems in addition (sometimes) to problems with ill treatment. Hopefully the breeding of these big cats is slowing down/stopping.

The sanctuary rescues other animals as well. The lemurs seemed to enjoy having people around; some of them had been ‘pets’ that became problematic for their owner.

There are also some wolf dogs and farm type animals. Providing a ‘forever home’ to all the animals rescued is what the sanctuary is about (not just tigers).

Ten Little Celebrations – March 2023

March has been a bit different than I expected…a lot more very cold starts to the days which have made it harder for the spring bulbs I planted last fall. Still – there was plenty to celebrate.

Clean car. The dust (and maybe salt) is rinsed off the car. I celebrated the days of driving a clean car…until I drove around the gravel road that is the wildlife loop at Hagerman National Wildlife Refuge! The door and hatch seals keep the dust from getting into the car but the spaces before the seals are covered and the car wash does not reach it!

Banana bread (that included the peels). I will never make banana bread without the peels again. Yes – organic bananas are a bit more expensive…but the bread is so good….well worth it.

Plans for our back yard. So many ideas…and enough time to make them happen! The evidence of the work I did last fall (planting bulbs) is giving me confidence that I can do more. Maybe I’ll even become a gardener.

Frosty forsythia. The cold mornings were problematic for some of early blooming flowers, bushes, and trees. I celebrated that I captured the beauty of frost on the forsythia flowers.

Pumpkin soup. I was surprised that I had more than 4 cans of pumpkin in my pantry….not sure how it happened. I opted to make soup with one of them. Tastey…colorful…a celebration with winter fare on a cold March day.

Staying standard time for sleep. I like for the sun to be coming up when I go down to my office and didn’t like the beginning of daylight savings time because it was suddenly dark again at that time….so this year I opted to not change my sleep schedule from standard time. I celebrate the light every morning with my first cup of tea.

Walking around the neighborhood ponds 2 days in a row. It seems like the month has had a lot of cold or wet days, so I celebrated when there were 2 warmer sunny days to make pleasant walks around our neighborhood ponds.

Two mockingbirds. This time of year, I look for pairs of birds around where I live. This year, I celebrated two mockingbirds close to my house. I hope they nest somewhere nearby. Last year we had a blue jay nest in one of our front yard red maples and barn swallows nested under our deck. There must be nests of mourning doves and finches nesting nearby too because we have so many of them.

New low weight for the year. Celebrating another month of taking off some weight. This needs to continue for as long as it takes to reach my goal (and then some to sustain it)!

Birdsong in the morning. The birds chorus in the morning and I celebrate the start of the day with them. I try to identify the birds I am hearing…a lot of robins usually but others join too.

Frosty Valentine’s

Valentine’s Day is a very commercialized celebration --- lots of red roses, chocolate and other candy often in red heart shaped boxes or the candy itself in the heart shape. If my husband and I do anything for Valentine’s – we do it on our monthly wedding anniversary which is within a few days of the 14th. This year it will be our 601st monthly anniversary!

One positive outcome of the commercialization of the celebration, I am anticipating lots of candy on sale on the 15th….hoping for a good selection to buy at a reduced price for my daughter and son-in-law to have in their campus offices for their meetings with students!

Another positive aspect to Valentine’s is its position in February. The winter can be gray, cold, and icy. Maybe Valentine’s Day should be a prompt to look around for beauty in the ‘wild’ to share with someone near and dear: a sunrise or the beauty of ice crystals at close range….choose to see beauty in February outdoors (or through a window)!

Missed the Snow at Home - Again

I was in Texas last week when I snowed at home in Nixa, Missouri – this is the third snow in Missouri that I’ve missed entirely! This time there was about 5 inches of snow overnight. I enjoyed the event vicariously through pictures.

My daughter sent pictures of the snowy scenes from her windows in Springfield first thing in the morning; she has big plans to enjoy her Snow Day. Her house is on a corner; one street was plowed but it wasn’t the one her driveway is on! The magnolia – with its big leaves – held clumps of snow. Even the maple, that doesn’t have any leaves at all, looked flocked.

My husband sent pictures a bit later. Around our house, the pines and hollies held a lot of snow. There were tracks in the snow from an animal – not sure what it could have been; the area we live in now is not at all like our Maryland yard that seemed to be a highway for deer heading back to the forest.  

I was surprised that the Japanese dogwood (a deciduous tree) held so much snow. I checked it when I got home and was glad that none of the branches seemed damaged.

My husband walked out our back gate and then around the pond. It was a winter wonderland!

Maybe eventually – I’ll be at home when a big snow event happens!

A 50th Anniversary

I posted about my parents’ 70th anniversary back in December; now I am celebrating my own 50th wedding anniversary with my husband. The anniversary prompts me to think about those 50 years of shared life from different perspectives.

Our external focus shifted through the years:

  • For the first 10 years, we were completing our education – a PhD for him, a masters for me. I was working full time during those years…not thinking about computer science as a career for the first 5 years but gradually realizing that I liked the work too much to switch fields. From the beginning he seemed to have a clearer idea of what he wanted to do. We were the first in both our families to go beyond an undergraduate degree.

  • We moved to the east coast for my husband’s work; it was a great career move for me too. We were both focused on our careers for about 5 years.

  • Then we decided to have a child and took the precautions needed for a successful pregnancy in our mid-30s. We thought we were prepared when our daughter was born but quickly realized that there was a learning curve that was just beginning. Between the two of us we successfully juggled parenting and careers…until she went off to college 20 years later.

  • There were 5 years of career focus with occasional bursts of activity to help my daughter move out of the dorm into an apartment, get to an internship, or move for graduate school. The internship and graduate school were more than halfway across the US!

  • 10 years ago - I retired and my husband started a ramp down from his career that continued for several years.

We’ve lived in several states over the 50 years: Texas for 10, Virginia for 3, Maryland for 36.5, Missouri for .5 years. The two long haul moves (from Texas to Virginia and from Maryland to Missouri) were quite different. We had a lot more household items to move the second time, the technology of finding a new house/selling our old one had improved dramatically, and we were able to buy our current house rather than get a mortgage.

Our shared interests have evolved over the years.

  • Photography. My husband was the one that enjoyed photography from the beginning….doing his own black/white and color developing (and printing too). I remember in our first house when one of the developing chemicals was not diluted enough when he poured it down the kitchen sink and it dissolved the disposal flaps! We have a lot of negatives and slides from those pre-digital years. The transition to digital happened about the time our daughter was old enough to start taking pictures. My interest in photography picked up a little when my daughter was born but ramped up dramatically once I retired.

  • Travel. From the very beginning we’ve both enjoyed day trips and vacations to outdoor destinations: gardens, state parks, and national parks. In the beginning, we economized by car/tent camping and not eating out. By the time we moved to Virginia we could afford flying, staying in hotels, and eating out although the road trip still dominated our vacations. When my daughter was born, we shifted our accommodations to ones that had a small kitchen to accommodate her food requirements/preferences. Some of our travel was associated with either my career or my husband’s…so that part of the travel was paid for as part of our work. After she got older and as we travelled more on our own, we enjoyed short term house rentals. For a few years before the COVID-19 pandemic, my husband and I used birding festivals as a focus for our travels.

  • Astronomy. My husband was interested in astronomy before I knew him. One of our early dates included a lunar eclipse at the local astronomy club’s observatory. In the early years of our marriage, we participated in grazing occultations (stars and the mountains of the moon); my role was to help him get the telescope set up as quickly as possible in the assigned location so he could take the measurements. Later I used the cast iron telescope mount to add weight in the back of my rear-wheel drive car – to give it more traction on snowy days in Virginia. His astronomy activity ebbed although he did replace his telescope; we (daughter included) observed the sunrise in 2000…our celebration of the new millennium. Once he retired, he became active the local astronomy club in Maryland and we both camped on the field for a star party at a dark sky site in Virginia several times; he liked the dark sky (and being able to call it a night whenever he got tired) and I enjoyed being outdoors, hiking during the day.

A lot has happened in 50 years and we’re both realizing how fortunate we are that the big decision we made all those years ago was a good one for both of us!

Frost Flowers from Christmas Day

Christmas morning in Carrollton was very cold. It was a rare morning when my car had been outside overnight…and the conditions were right for frost flowers (fortunately on the metal rather than the glass). I was bundled up well enough to take a few pictures with my phone (Samsung Galaxy S10e) before I left the hotel. It was just after dawn…a little serendipity to begin the day.